Stories like this one are why many different states are struggling to open records for adoptees. Turns out that an adoptee was jailed for three years for stalking and harassing his birth mother because she didn't want to reunite. I'm sure that those opposed to opening records have cited or will use this case as their prime example to keep those records sealed forever.

But they're missing the point.

This mentally disturbed individual convinced the court system to open his records because of a health issue. He lied his way through the process and got what he desired. And so, what's the point of a closed records system, really? Those who want the information can and will get it in some way or another. If you are desperate enough, there is always a way to do something.

He went around the system. He got what he wanted. And he used the information in a negative way. He isn't exactly the poster child for either the adoption system in general or open records, no, but he proves a point. Closed records accomplish little in the way of "protecting" these birth mothers like the big wigs are so quick to point out as their reason behind keeping records sealed.

I'm sure that particular birth mother may not feel all gung-ho about opening records. And others do share her opinion without having to go through the horrors of being stalked. But it is my opinion, along with a large number of other relinquishing mothers, that our children have a right to their information. Quite honestly, if the records were opened and this fact was made known to all members of the triad, more work could be put into possible reunion emotions. If this mother had known that her son had the ability to locate her, would she have put more thought into what turning down a reunion would do or feel like for either party? While she had no control over his mental state, would the outcome have been differently if she had been mentally preparing for his eventual arrival in her life? No one can say for sure in that specific case but it does make sense that those with the knowledge that someone is coming would be better ready to handle reunions.

All in all, that story is sad and disturbing. I've read horror stories of adoptees being stalked and bothered by their biological parents (like in this book) but this is one of the first times that I've heard of an adoptee being jailed for such atrocities. I hope all family members are able to heal sooner than later.

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For more on closed adoption, read these posts.



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