That's right. I watched the movie. Even though I said I wouldn't. Even though I knew it was probably not in the best interest of my mascara. Even though I felt like I was dissenting against the sisterhood of birth mothers worldwide. But, last Friday, I rented it. I watched it. Alone. (Not the best choice, by the way.) And I didn't hate the movie. Again with the dissenting.

There were things I liked and things that didn't sit so well. This week I will be covering thirteen things that I liked in the movie. You know what next week will bring! Oh, and before you chastise me, I am fully aware that I said I, 1) wouldn't see the movie and, 2) have had enough of the hype. But, man, I just had to see what all the buzz was about so I could either join in or tell all of you to shut your traps!

And now, it's my turn.

1. The soundtrack! Okay, okay. I know that everyone said that and I, too, figured, "How great can it be?" Yeah. Well, I downloaded it after watching the movie. I'm listening to it currently to get in the "mood" for writing this piece.

2. The actors. Ellen Page did a great job with sarcasm, emotion and the issues in general. I absolutely adore Allison Janney and J.K. Simmons as Juno's parents and feel that they both handled their roles quite well. While this isn't my favorite role for Jennifer Garner, I think she did a good job even though I mostly disliked her character. And, yes, Jason Bateman did an even better job at being even more unlikeable. Really? The acting "made" this movie. If you would have had different actors in these roles, things would have fallen flat. I was pleased.

3. The comedy parts were comedic. The first half of the movie did make me laugh. Rainn Wilson's brief role as the convenience store clerk had me giggling, though I can imagine that those who aren't Wilson fans (or The Office fans) maybe weren't as amused as say, oh, me! There were lines in the movie (HONEST TO BLOG?) that had me howling. I like to laugh. I didn't think I would laugh at anything in this movie. So, I was pleasantly surprised.

4. Stepmom telling off the ultrasound technician. Now this part actually starts to step into some adoption territory. Juno is getting the "big" ultrasound with her stepmom and best friend present. The ultrasound tech passes some verbal judgment of teen pregnancy and young mothers, stating that it is better that Juno will be placing instead of parenting. And stepmom busts out with this gem after Juno and her best friend try to defend the situation and Juno herself.

They could be utterly negligent. Maybe they'll do a far [worse] job of raising a kid than my dumb[butt] step-daughter would. Have you considered that?

[The quote has been edited for family blog!] I laughed because it was funny. But my heart swelled with pride, acknowledgment and the fact that on this one, they hit the nail on the head. This is where I started to realize that the movie wasn't totally off-base with regard to adoption issues. Adoptive parents aren't magically and guaranteed better parents than those mothers who choose to place their babies. The world needs to know that as they so often judge birth mothers as dysfunctional, even in future parenting situations. I wanted to jump through my TV screen and hug the heck out of that stepmom. And, well, then tell Juno to parent. But, alas, that didn't happen.

5. Juno's admission that she doesn't know what kind of girl she is. I resonated with that statement. I suppose I should set it up before I go on to explain. Juno and her dad are talking. He says, "I thought you were the kind of girl who knew when to say when." Juno replies with, "I don't know what kind of girl I am." That sentence right there is one that I think ever young expectant mothers thinks at one point or another. When I got pregnant, it shook me to my core. I mean, I was one of those people who thought in high school when others around me were pregnant, "Oh, they must be bad. I'd never get pregnant." Yeah, my advice? Never think that. Because good girls get pregnant, too. So, when I found myself pregnant, I had to reevaluate whether I viewed myself as good or bad. I didn't know who I was in this new role and I didn't know who I was going to become. It's actually just in recent years that I'm beginning to accept that I am still a good person despite my short-comings in life. It's been a journey. So, I really appreciated that line.

6. Some realities in experience and language. Juno kept referring to the baby as "yours" when talking to Vanessa and Mark. Some people have said that was something they didn't like about the movie. I found it to be totally realistic. I am not saying that I agree with it. I am just saying that I find it to be realistic. Some agencies today really push expectant mothers to separate themselves from the child in their womb and consider it to already be the adoptive parents' child. We see Juno doing that via her language choices throughout the movie. Now, perhaps, the general public not touched by adoption won't see that as an inside look at the things wrong with today's adoptions. But I did. I was glad that it was included not because I think mothers should be emotionally separating from their children but because it is an inside look. Someone might get it. It resonated with me yet again.

7. Juno's defense mechanism. Yeah, yeah. Some people are quick to say that Juno had no emotions and it portrays the decision to place in an unrealistic, awful way. But I saw emotion. As someone who will laugh, ignore the situation or put on a tough outer shell when things are too hard to process, I "got" her sarcastic personality. I've been known to throw out a few quips when I don't want people to see how hurt I am inside. I've been known to change subjects. I've been known to laugh and pretend like it's "all good" and that I'm not completely dying inside. In fact, find me a birth mother that didn't go through a denial phase both before and after relinquishment and I will show you a birth mother that is still in denial. We all process things differently.

8. The parts where Juno's emotions break past her tough outer shell. In the van as she's making the decision to continue with the match? When she has her hands on her belly and her face kind of twists and contorts? Did everyone else who watched the movie and said that Juno showed no emotion go to the bathroom during that scene? Because this was the part of the movie in which I started to lose it. Absolutely lose it. There are others but this one really stuck out in my head.

9. Okay, back to the adoptive parents aren't perfect theme. I know, I already hit upon it above when talking about what the stepmom said but this is slightly different. For so many mothers and fathers who place, they are convinced (and they really believe) that adoptive families are somehow magically better and exempt from the troubles of the world. Truth? Adoptive families have financial problems. They divorce. They die. Expectant parents deep in the mire of their own unplanned pregnancy "crisis" don't always realize that adoptive parents are like them in these ways. I was glad to see that the movie portrayed the adoptive family in a realistic fashion. Some will say it was a negative way, and, well, I can see that, too. But I do think it's good that the general public is getting to see that adoptive families aren't perfect. I think that's important in a way.

10. Juno's stepmom making her maternity jeans. Maybe I'm the only one who felt this was one of the sweetest little parts of the movie but it moved me to tears. It really did. How many birth mothers wanted someone to show them love in little, real ways? That's what this was to me.

11. Talk about love. Okay. I'm a sucker for love. When Juno found out that the potential family may be splitting, she asked her Dad this question:

I just need to know if it's possible for two people to stay happy together forever, or at least for a few years.

Her dad's reply is real, hitting on the fact that it's not easy. He speaks of his own failed marriage and remarriage to Juno's stepmom. And then, in true fatherly fashion, he offers advice. Advice that we can all learn from.

In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your [bum]. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.

I smiled. I'm lucky enough to have found someone who thinks the sun shines out my butt even though I've got a long, long list of personal faults and a truckload of baggage.

12. The whole birthing experience. Honestly? This is also going to be on my "things I don't like about Juno" list. But it goes here, too. Why? Even though it was emotionally challenging for me to watch, the look on Juno's face when her baby is born will stick with me forever. Mainly because I don't recall my own face when the Munchkin finally made her way out of my body and into this world. It was a personification of something I've never seen in my own memories. And it broke my heart into a million pieces.

13. The scene in the hospital with Juno's dad. This? Also wrecked me. But it won't go on the "things I don't like about Juno" list. It stays here. Because it so closely mirrors my own experience. Juno is laying in bed, crying softly. She is sweaty and worn out from labor and delivery. Her dad is sitting by her bedside, gently petting her and, at one point, says something to the effect of, "You'll have your turn someday." (I can't find the specific quote.) And while some birth mothers may find this as a negative, as no future child can replace a relinquished child, this little exchange broke my heart in so many ways. And not in a bad way exactly. The compassion of her father right here is what hit me. So many fathers wouldn't be at the hospital, wouldn't bother trying to say anything that they thought was comforting. But Juno's dad said what he thought was appropriate. And I loved him for it.


Next Thursday I'll hit thirteen things that didn't sit so well with me... even if they are true to adoption life. So, stay tuned!

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For more on my love-hate relationship with Juno, try these posts.



Amusing Photo Credit.