“You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.” -Anonymous
As a birth mom, one of the things I have heard the most from others is ‘I could never do that’ or ‘I don’t think I could ever be that strong or unselfish’. It doesn’t bother me to hear these things, I often think they are meant as compliments. But, I just realize that they can’t understand the situation I was put in. I love this quote (above) because I know it is so true! You never know what you are capable of until you are actually presented with the situation.
I used to think of myself as such a weak person, because I wasn’t able to leave my ex & choose a better life. When I found out I was pregnant, I wasn’t allowed to be weak anymore, because now everything revolved around my baby. How sad is it that many women, and people in general, aren’t willing to do hard things to better their own lives, but they can do them for those they love so easily? My self-esteem was obviously very low at the time I was with my ex (the birth father), but I didn’t want that to effect my little baby’s life for the worse. I was able to find strength & leave my ex & seek help. It might have been one of the hardest things I have ever done, but it was the only choice I had.
When talking to other birth mothers, I have often noticed a commonality that we all know we were chosen to be birth mothers. Many of us believe that Heavenly Father knew we were strong enough to place our child for adoption, and that is why we were chosen. We could go through with it and survive.
Now when I struggle with self-esteem or other problems, I am able to recall that I was strong & did something great (even if I sometimes feel like that is the only thing I’ve done well). I know that Heavenly Father knows I need this boost every once in awhile & I am so grateful for the trials that I went through and overcame. I learned that I can be strong in the face of adversity.