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Today marks the 34th Annual March for Life in Washington. The Supreme Court issued its decision on January 22, 1973, ruling that an abortion was a fundamental right under the United States Constitution. The March for Life is a pro-life event in which like-minded individuals join together in a rally on the Mall and then walk to Capitol Hill.
There. Did I present that in a non-biased manner? Because I’m about to get ten thousand different kinds of biased up in this blog. Which may be surprising if you read my post in my faith and adoption series yesterday. I may not be popular in some crowds today but that’s okay. I’m used to being unpopular. I had glasses, braces and bad hair in ninth grade. Been there, done that.
As I said, I grew up with pro-life parents, surrounded by strong pro-life influences. However, when my mother would try to discuss the topic with me, I could never form my own opinion. On the one hand, I didn’t want to disappoint my mother by either dissenting from her views or making it seem like I was a woman with little to no moral fiber. (Remember, this is my teenage train of thought. Read on!) It wasn’t until I was faced with my own unplanned pregnancy and literal life or death situation that I was able to form my own opinions, which might not be what you assume.
Yes, I chose life for the Munchkin. Even after everything I have been through, I would choose the same thing. It was the right choice for me. Which is why I am adamantly pro-choice. There. I said it. Bring out the pictures of fetuses.
So, if I chose life, why am I adamantly pro-choice? The answer is quite simple and ties into my issues with the church and this topic.
It saddens me, to no end, that the same group of people who should rejoice in the fact that I chose life for my child still condemns me because I’m an evil, dirty, no-good birth mother. Judgements like these serve no purpose in solving the issues that face both the pro-life and pro-choice movements.
Those holding signs of aborted fetuses would be better served by joining together with fellow pro-life believers in their local areas and brain-storming ideas on how to better support mothers and children. If you legitimately want to force every single woman who finds herself pregnant to bring every single baby into this world, you’ve got to have a better game plan than making it a constitutional amendment and attending rallies. You’ve got to start welcoming these women and children into your communities, your churches, your schools and your playgroups. You’ve got to stop pointing fingers and instead start offering your hand-me-downs, your experience for advice and support and an understanding shoulder to cry on when things seem to be overwhelming. And that’s just the small stuff, folks. I’m not even talking about the facts on how state assistance is failing pregnant mothers and children all over our country. I’m not even talking about discrimination brought on by employers when single mothers have to tend to their sick children. I’m talking about these individuals, holding the signs, who are talking the talk but also need to be walking the walk. Support comes from more than just running your mouth. Take a pregnant woman into your home and help her get on her feet if you want to see that child born. Take a vested interest. Actually DO something to help that unborn child by caring for that mother.
Life was the proper choice for me. I am glad that I had the right and the time to make such a decision. I believe all women should be granted such a luxury. It boils down to the fact that, in adoption, I didn’t feel as if I had a choice.
And no woman should ever… EVER… have to feel that way.
All of that said: whether you are pro-choice or pro-life, please share with me what you are DOING to better help support mothers and children. As I continue to prayerfully consider the path God wants me to take in this particular topic, the more ideas I am presented with, the better chance I have at creating something truly beneficial to mothers and children in our area. Let’s brain-storm together. 
Thanks for this post Jenna, as another pro-choice woman who chose life, you have described what I feel on a regular basis.
Well, I’ll tell you I’m not doing enough but I appreciate this entry A LOT!!! You rock, Jenna!
Totally in agreement about being pro-choice but choosing life.
As for what I’m doing to help support… well right now I’m not doing anything, which makes me sad, ’cause gosh darn it I want to. I just haven’t found a place to lend a hand yet. But I looking.
Sign me up as another pro-choicer who chose life…for all the same reasons.
The home my son’s birthmother lived in during her pregnancy supports young moms in the KC area. They have a place to stay, counciling, food, clothing, job options. It is not an adoption agency. The only thing they ask is that a woman coming in is choosing life and not termination.
MOST women who stay at this particular house choose to parent their child, occasionally they choose adoption as did our son’s birthmother.
When ever we return to the KC area we bring bibles, infant formula, baby & maternity clothing, toys, food & toiletries for the mother’s pantry they run. The women earn points for completeing training, parenting classes, and assistance programs and can redeem the points for what they need at the pantry. They can live there for up to 2 years (with their children) after the birth of their baby.
Deb; very cool. I also donate to a local pregnancy center that doesn’t promote adoption (though resources are available if a mother asks) but instead has a smorgasboard of clothes, wipes, diapers, formula, as well as staff who help them secure jobs and funding available to them. Glad to hear that you’ve found something likewise to donate to!
Jenna – this was a really great post. I think you have a really valuable perspective in the whole debate. Thanks for this –
A
I am deeply offended that you characterize the entire pro-life movement as “Marching for Life but Not Doing Anything to Uplift Said Lives” based almost entirely on your own personal experience. Where is the research that you’re normally so proud of doing?
Dandelions, did I say the whole pro-life movement? This post was criticizing the act of marching instead of doing something. Hence the lines like, “Those holding signs” and the subject itself. The subject doesn’t say, “Pro-Life Sucks.” It states, rather specifically, the absolute pointlessness of marches and roadside protests. But thank you for your ridicule.
AMEN to “Those holding signs of aborted fetuses would be better served by joining together with fellow pro-life believers in their local areas and brain-storming ideas on how to better support mothers and children. If you legitimately want to force every single woman who finds herself pregnant to bring every single baby into this world, you’ve got to have a better game plan than making it a constitutional amendment and attending rallies. You’ve got to start welcoming these women and children into your communities, your churches, your schools and your playgroups. You’ve got to stop pointing fingers and instead start offering your hand-me-downs, your experience for advice and support and an understanding shoulder to cry on when things seem to be overwhelming. And that’s just the small stuff, folks. I’m not even talking about the facts on how state assistance is failing pregnant mothers and children all over our country.”
I attended one March for life with family when I was a teenager. It struck me as a good thing because people should be valued by our government. But saddly as you’ve noted, we aren’t. That’s why I believe it’s better to do what you said…which by the way, that’s behaving more like a pro-lifer in my opinion (helping others to raise their kids in any way..employment…food…clothes, etc.). That being said, I also value showing the grotesque pics of unborn babies to women and men who are faced with an unplanned preg. so they know what they are about to do and don’t find out later and then experience years of depression or even suicide.
I’m also a birthmother in an open adoption. Together, we can and will make a difference. It’s not about what seperates us, it’s about what brings us together. Sorry so long.