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This photo is from a visit last summer. I’m feeling nostalgic this summer as our family unit is about to change again this winter with the arrival of Munchkin’s next brother. I’m realizing, quite suddenly, that the bonding between Parker and the Munchkin will never be exactly the same as what Nicholas had with her over the past two years. Ages will be further apart and there will be more people involved which means less time for one-on-one, head-smooshing kisses like this one.
I realize that all parents go through this as they continue to build their families. As you add more siblings to your family, you realize that some of them will be close and some of them may not form the kind of relationship that you’d wish for your children to have with one another. As a birth parent, it’s even less out of my “control” than it is for parents whose children are eating, sleeping and fighting under the same roof.
Nicholas and the Munchkin have been rather lucky, in my opinion. Close enough in age to interact without any parents freaking out over someone being hurt (though I’m sure that will come back into play someday!), they have shown a continued bond over the past two years. Nicholas now asks for her by name, carries her picture around and enjoys playing with her during a visit. She does the same. Will Parker be afforded a similar bond? Will I be able to concentrate on Parker bonding with the Munchkin during a visit when I’ve also got to concentrate on what Nicholas is doing? Will I get head-smooshing kissy pictures with my second son and my first child? Will Nicholas be jealous of any bond Parker has with the Munchkin?
The question list really goes on and on.
In short: whether or not I find the appropriate answers to those questions (and more) before we just end up winging it, I am so very thankful that I have the pictures that I do of my first two children. They have shown a love for each other, from very early on in what everyone else in the world assumes is a confusing relationship. They have never seemed confused. They have readily welcomed one another into their hearts. They seem to have enough love to share with many more people than the world wants them to love.
Because love is being able to love someone the rest of the world thinks you shouldn’t have room in your heart for… years before the rest of the world thinks you should be able to show love for another human being.
Love is those two kiddos. (And the one to come!)
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For more Love Thursday, read:
1. Love Thursday: When Siblings Act Like Siblings.
2. Love Thursday: Nature and Nurture.
3. Love Thursday: Daddy and Daughter.
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Photo Credit: ©Jenna Hatfield, 2006.
