Let's take it back Old School!

This picture symbolizes a lot of "stuff" in our adoption. Yes, it's me, D and the Munchkin. But it's two Moms, together. It's a crazy, wriggly Munchkin, smiling and comfortable between the two of us. It's J & D stepping outside of comfort zones they were told to keep and welcoming me into their home and lives. It's me, stepping out of the advice that I should move on and forget, and embracing my role as a birth mother. It's all of us, coming together, for the kiddo in the middle of the shot.

It's also way cheesy and fun because we're matching. ;) HA! LOVE IT!

We had our first visit together when the Munchkin was about four months old. I was having a birthday and everyone decided it would be a nice way to celebrate. And it was! The visit was emotionally hard. Josh and I actually stayed in a hotel as opposed to with J & D as we do nowadays but looking back that was a wise choice. It gave me time in the evening to process feelings and thoughts!

We got to spend time together, learning more about each other. We went bowling. We had a birthday cake. We got these portraits taken. We just hung out. And it was good!

Though, I did have a few moments of uncomfortable ease. You see, Munchkin was only four months old at this time. As I have just in the past six months started to find comfort in my title of firstmother, well, it would logically make sense that I hadn't found that ease and peace yet. So, the photographer, who was nosy, asked who we all were to each other. J, bless him, just simply said that I was their daughter's birthmother and we wanted pictures together. Maybe that's why my cheeks look slightly pink in some pictures because I surely don't wear blush. Ever. (Okay, I think my wedding day. But ew.) At the end of the photo session, I was so emotionally overwhelmed that I had a small panic attack while trying to pick pictures. Gah, I can remember that like it was yesterday.

Was the emotional craziness worth it to have these keepsakes? Yes.

In fact, I think I need to dig this picture out and display it somewhere. I had it out for awhile but I usually keep my frames and pictures pretty up to date. I think this one is too much of a classic to tuck away.

Happy Love Thursday!

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