Part One, Part Two and Part Three.

4a? Oh yes. Part 4a. This one may take a few posts to look at fully. It's controversial, heavy in subjectry and consequence and involves more than just the birth parent side of the triad. It needs a thorough look which I hope to accomplish. And now, the controversial fourth recommendation:

Recommendation 4: Modify state laws on the timing of relinquishment and revocation so that parents have several weeks after childbirth before an adoption decision becomes irrevocable. Ideally, this would include a minimum of one week after birth before a relinquishment can be signed and then a substantial revocation period.

Before I get hate mail from adoptive parents all over the world, remember that I am just the messenger. This recommendation was formed by the Evan B Donaldson Adoption Institute as a finding of their recent Birthparent Study. Please refer all hate mail for even mentioning such a thing to the Institute.

I, personally, am not sure where I stand on this specific topic. It does involve quite a few different issues for birth parents as well as over-lapping to have an effect on all other sides of the triad. What's right and what's wrong I think will have to vary on a case by case basis. What some birth parents feel is right, adoptive parents will balk at. What some adoptive parents feel is right will seem highly unethical to some birth parents. Where's the happy medium?

I honestly don't know if there is one on this specific topic.

Before we get all up in arms, let's get our ducks in a row. For more information on the length of time before the Termination of Parental Rights can be signed in your state and how long it takes for that TPR to become irrevocable, visit this site. (Select your state, tick the box next to Consent to Adoption and then click GO!) To be more vague, here are some general statistics regarding TPR:

Approximately 46 Statesnd the District of Columbia specify in statute when a birth parent may execute consent to adoption. Fifteen States and the Northern Mariana Islands allow birth parents to consent at any time after the birth of the child, while 29 States require a waiting period before consent can be executed. Approximately 12 States and the Northern Mariana Islands allow an alleged birth father to execute consent at anytime before or after the child's birth.

The shortest waiting periods are 12 and 24 hours, and the longest are 10 and 15 days.he most common waiting period, required in 14 States14 and the District of Columbia, is 72 hours, or 3 days. Only two States (Alabama and Hawaii) allow the birth mother to consent before the birth of her child; however, the decision to consent must be reaffirmed after the child's birth.

Looking at this, one can easily say, on all sides of the triad, that twelve hours is far too short a time to expect a parent to sign the Termination of Parental Rights. Just assuming that the mother has gone through labor with any form of pain medication, it would be unethical for us to expect her to sign a life-altering document at that point in time. Pain medicines (and pain!) can cloud judgement. Simply put, twelve hours is too short a time. I placed in Pennsylvania where the waiting period is 72 hours (3 days). I didn't sign until approximately five days after birth due to a problem with the (really awful) lawyer.

And that's something I need to mention here: just because it is a minimum requirement to sign does not mean that a parent has to sign the TPR on that third day. They can take four days, five days, or two weeks if they please. However, again, those parents considering signing are not told, "Hey, if you're unsure today, take a few days and come back. We also have counseling available for you to better look at your options." Instead, papers are shoved across tables.

After the TPR is signed, the revocation period comes into play. Prior to the signing of the TPR, nothing needs to be revoked: that new mother is the only mother legally recognized by court of law. Nothing needs to be signed or fought in court to parent that child. However, after TPR is signed, there is a period of time where a birth parent can also decide to parent his or her child.

Mississippi, Nebraska, American Samoa, and the Virgin Islands make no provisions in statute for revocation of consent, and Massachusetts and Utah specifically require that all consents are irrevocable.

In most States, the law provides that consent may be revoked prior to the entry of the final adoption decree under specific circumstances or within specified time limits. The circumstances under which withdrawal of consent may be permitted by a State can include:


* Consent was obtained by fraud, duress, or coercion.
* The birth parent is allowed to withdraw consent within a specified period of time, after which consent becomes irrevocable.
* The birth parent is allowed to withdraw consent within a specified period of time, after which consent becomes irrevocable unless there is evidence of fraud or duress.
* The birth parent is allowed to withdraw consent within a specified period of time, after which consent becomes irrevocable unless it can be shown that revocation is in the best interests of child.
* There is a finding that withdrawal of consent is in the best interests of the child.
* The birth parents and adoptive parents mutually agree to the withdrawal of consent.
* An adoptive placement is not finalized with a specific family or within a specified period of time.

Okay. That's a lot of information. Again, to use an example, looking at Pennsylvania:

Revocation of Consent
Citation: 23 Pa. § 2711(c)

* The birth or putative father's consent is irrevocable unless revoked within 30 days after the child’s birth or the execution of consent, whichever occurs later.
* The birth mother's consent is irrevocable 30 days after execution.
* A person may challenge the validity of a consent only by filing a petition alleging fraud or duress, within the earlier of:
o 60 days after the birth of the child or the execution of consent, whichever is later
o 30 days after entry of the adoption decree

To explain in layman's terms: in Pennsylvania, a birth mother has thirty days after signing the TPR to decide that she does, in fact, want to parent her child. If she feels that she has been treated fraudulently or made to sign under duress, she can file a petition up to sixty days after the TPR has been signed or the birth of the child (whichever is later) or thirty days after the entry of the adoption decree.

Thirty days is a long time. Right? Yet, J & D endured that time. They bonded with Munchkin, stayed up those sleepless nights and called her their daughter. Of course, once again, I wasn't informed that I could still make the decision to parent during that time so they really had nothing to worry about from my end. No doubt they worried though.

Tomorrow I'll discuss some of the pros and cons from both the birth parent and adoptive parent point of view concerning a lengthened time for both TPR and revocation periods.

If you would like to weigh in on this topic, as a birth parent or adoptive parent, please e-mail me at firstparentblogger@adoptionmail.com by 4pm on Monday, November 27th. Please keep your e-mails as brief as possible (but still explain your view), free of sweeping generalizations about one side of the triad or another and respectful.

In the meantime, I'll try to figure out whow I feel about the issue and attempt to come to a coherent position on this particular recommendation.

But, for the record, 12 hours is far, far too short a time period.