Do you read adoption blogs? Not just this blog, obviously, but other blogs that contain adoption content. As a birth parent, do you find it difficult? I do. At times, I feel overwhelmed with the amount of information about adoption that is available on the blogosphere. Sometimes I avoid my RSS reader because I don’t want to think any more about adoption for the day.
Yet, I always come back to the adoption blogs.
I’ve learned a lot over the years from others’ experiences that they are willing to share with the world via their blogs. I’ve grown in my own journey, learned things about myself and others in the triad and, really, “met” a lot of people who have helped shape who I am today with regard to adoption.
Why then, if I view it as such a good thing, do I avoid them sometimes?
I suppose it’s a form of overload. I can only handle so much thought and discussion about the topic of adoption before my brain says, “Okay, that’s enough. Back away.” Additionally, sometimes people are discussing very difficult topics. Sometimes it’s hard for me to consider certain things because of where I am in my journey. One of the hardest things for me to read, actually, are posts from brand new birth parents. I can almost hear in their written word the desire for someone to say, “You did the right thing.” With adoption being so much in the grey and less in the right and wrong of things, I can’t say that to them most times. Then I feel guilty! When I start feeling guilty, it’s time to walk away for awhile.
I don’t just read birth parent blogs. I read blogs by adoptive parents and adoptees as well. While I learn many things from them, sometimes I have to avoid their blogs, too. Again, it’s mostly when I start feeling guilty because they struggle with issues or can’t seem to make something work for themselves. What can I say? Guilt is something I struggle with. I’ll work on it.
I do know that reading adoption blogs is something that I will continue to do for years to come. Finding a balance will likely prove to be an ongoing struggle but I’ll work on it. Will you?