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I’m in love with the musical Wicked. Well, to be fair, I’m in love with a lot of musicals. I always have been a musical theater dork. I tried to deny it for awhile but, truth be told, I now shamelessly embrace my inner dork. In fact, I celebrate her by letting myself to listen to musical soundtracks all day long while I work. But, back to Wicked: I’m infatuated. Inspired. Impressed. And, yes, In Love with the musical.
And since I can turn anything into a discussion on adoption, I have to share a certain selection of lyrics from the song “Defying Gravity” with you.
Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by the rules
Of someone else’s game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It’s time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!
I can’t specifically remember the part of my healing journey in which this became my mantra. But something did change within me. I stopped caring (as much) what others (others meaning those who weren’t involved in our relationship) thought about the ins and outs of our adoption. I stopped second-guessing my decision to place, to stay involved in her life, to have and parent other children. I started trusting myself. I started stepping out in faith and finding that, really, we were just fine.
I think we all need mantras as we work through our healing journey. When I’m feeling discouraged (adoption or otherwise), I throw on this song and sing it at the top of my lungs. Even if you can’t sing, finding a song that you relate to can be life-changing.
As for this song specifically, I know that as a birth mother, you’ve often felt as if you’re being forced to listen to others, to live your life as others are dictating. I encourage you to defy gravity, to defy limits, to find your own way. Don’t let anyone bring you down! You can make your adoption journey whatever you need it to be.
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Photo Credit.
