Blogging about adoption as a birth parent can start a dialogue between you and those who are reading. In fact, that's often the point of blogging in general: to start a dialogue. The real benefit for birth parents is when people whom you are close to are reading.

Examples include your spouse, your own parents, your child's adoptive parents or your adult child. Before you freak out and say, "I don't want some of those people reading what I write," I'm going to challenge you with the question of, "Why?"

I understand that we all need safe places to vent, cry and rant. I have those places myself and I treasure them deeply. However, as blogs have become increasingly accepted by the general public as a go-to-place for information, bloggers are being held to an increasingly higher standard. As such, I would not suggest a public blog to be your cussing board. That doesn't mean you can't rant but it does mean you should rant with language you wouldn't mind your grandmother reading.

Furthermore, if those in your life can't accept your reality, put into words, then the dialogue needs to be started. If they're uncomfortable with your grief, you need to talk about why. If they don't want to accept your regret, you need to discuss why your regret isn't infringing on their life. If you're angry, they need to understand that anger isn't always a negative reaction but often a positive push towards action. To be fair, if they're highly uncomfortable with what you're writing and aren't interested in having an honest dialogue about the issue, no one is holding a gun to their heads and forcing them to read. You are free to remind them of that fact.

It's never a bad thing to learn about those that you love. Some things may be harder to learn. They may be uncomfortable. They may bring up some issues that absolutely need to be dealt with in order to move forward with life and relationships. But dealing with things is better than not dealing with things. Trust me.

For another positive blogging tip, tune in tomorrow!

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For more on bloggers and blogging, read these posts.




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