Comments on: Adoption Language: Titles and my Preference http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen A blog for and about parents who have placed a child for adoption. Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:02:45 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: merrill1277 http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1273 merrill1277 Sun, 24 Sep 2006 04:36:04 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1273 a late # 26.<br /> <br /> I think I'm going back to bio. Plants are biological but don't have a heart, soul or spirit. So its not because I myself feel 'bio' because I know I'm more than just DNA in a body, but it's how a certain two people have always seen me... as a non-person. So this is what's real for me regarding my own adoption reality. a late # 26.

I think I’m going back to bio. Plants are biological but don’t have a heart, soul or spirit. So its not because I myself feel ‘bio’ because I know I’m more than just DNA in a body, but it’s how a certain two people have always seen me… as a non-person. So this is what’s real for me regarding my own adoption reality.

]]> By: Jenna Hatfield http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1272 Jenna Hatfield Sat, 23 Sep 2006 00:32:47 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1272 Angela; :) I feel famous. Or something nerdier. ;)<br /> <br /> Coley; I tend to user first and birthmother interchangeably. Interchangably. However you spell it. We just took a huge nap in our home. :) Angela; :) I feel famous. Or something nerdier. ;)

Coley; I tend to user first and birthmother interchangeably. Interchangably. However you spell it. We just took a huge nap in our home. :)

]]> By: Coley S. http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1271 Coley S. Fri, 22 Sep 2006 14:37:26 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1271 Welcome to the blogs Jenna! I was glad to see your name as the new blogger - your writing is usually so thought provoking. <br /> <br /> I posted about this not too terribly long ago myself. It is a big debate. I too, prefer the term firstmother but in my everyday writing and lingo I tend to use birthmother as it is more common and people tend to know what I am talking about when I use that term, although I do still find myself having to explain that term to people outside the adoption community. Welcome to the blogs Jenna! I was glad to see your name as the new blogger – your writing is usually so thought provoking.

I posted about this not too terribly long ago myself. It is a big debate. I too, prefer the term firstmother but in my everyday writing and lingo I tend to use birthmother as it is more common and people tend to know what I am talking about when I use that term, although I do still find myself having to explain that term to people outside the adoption community.

]]> By: Angela http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1270 Angela Fri, 22 Sep 2006 14:00:01 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1270 Welcome Jenna, I am enjoyed your introduction blog. <br /> <br /> I will admit that I am just a little bit jealous. 23 comments is a record for adoptionblogs.com. <br /> Welcome Jenna, I am enjoyed your introduction blog.

I will admit that I am just a little bit jealous. 23 comments is a record for adoptionblogs.com.

]]> By: Jenna Hatfield http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1269 Jenna Hatfield Fri, 22 Sep 2006 12:23:50 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1269 Dr G; Interesting points. I think it's just a case by case basis regarding that certain comfort level. D wasn't a biological Mother first but she was a stepmom first. It's all very interesting to look at the dynamics of others' adoptions and do a healthy compare and contrast. ;) Dr G; Interesting points. I think it’s just a case by case basis regarding that certain comfort level. D wasn’t a biological Mother first but she was a stepmom first. It’s all very interesting to look at the dynamics of others’ adoptions and do a healthy compare and contrast. ;)

]]> By: Dr. G http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1268 Dr. G Fri, 22 Sep 2006 08:14:24 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1268 i'm another one who is comfortable and secure in referring to my daughters' other mom, as their, mom, other mom, mommy, mother. i also have a biological son and i always thought that had something to do with my basic confidence as a mother, period. but maybe, i'm wrong about that and being a biological mother before becoming an adoptive mother doesn't have a single thing to do with one's comfort level in refering to the first mom as mom. <br /> <br /> i’m another one who is comfortable and secure in referring to my daughters’ other mom, as their, mom, other mom, mommy, mother. i also have a biological son and i always thought that had something to do with my basic confidence as a mother, period. but maybe, i’m wrong about that and being a biological mother before becoming an adoptive mother doesn’t have a single thing to do with one’s comfort level in refering to the first mom as mom.

]]> By: Jenna Hatfield http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1267 Jenna Hatfield Fri, 22 Sep 2006 03:02:06 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1267 Mo; you sure hit the nail on the head there. :) Can I call you Mo? ;) Mo; you sure hit the nail on the head there. :) Can I call you Mo? ;)

]]> By: Mo http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1266 Mo Fri, 22 Sep 2006 02:16:53 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1266 I like your post and I enjoyed the comments. When I think of my mother in Korea, I generally think of her as my birth mother and I probably won't stop thinking of her this way. I didn't choose that title because I felt that she was less than a first mother, but because it is a comfortable word for me to use. Personally, I think that it's all in the delivery. Anyone can take any title and make it sound great or horrible just by the words that they use around it. Just like Jenna says...I have been called multiple variations of my name and, as long as the variation is respectful, I answer to them without hesitation. Yet, I have a preference and that is how I introduce myself. I like your post and I enjoyed the comments. When I think of my mother in Korea, I generally think of her as my birth mother and I probably won’t stop thinking of her this way. I didn’t choose that title because I felt that she was less than a first mother, but because it is a comfortable word for me to use. Personally, I think that it’s all in the delivery. Anyone can take any title and make it sound great or horrible just by the words that they use around it. Just like Jenna says…I have been called multiple variations of my name and, as long as the variation is respectful, I answer to them without hesitation. Yet, I have a preference and that is how I introduce myself.

]]> By: Jenna Hatfield http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1265 Jenna Hatfield Fri, 22 Sep 2006 02:00:44 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1265 Ah, leftofright; I did no giving up. I'll discuss that some day.<br /> <br /> Jan; :) <br /> <br /> Jayne; thanks. :)<br /> <br /> pieberry; :) Thanks for the info on Ethiopia as well. I love learning these interesting little bits. <br /> <br /> Heather and Sandra; while I do refer to myself as firstmother and use it often in my writing, I also respond fine to birthmother in others' writing. If that makes ANY sense. ;) Sometimes I don't. It's kind of like how some people call me Jen and some people call me Jenna. But only my Dad can call me Jenny. ;)<br /> <br /> Okay. I'm rambled out. Ah, leftofright; I did no giving up. I’ll discuss that some day.

Jan; :)

Jayne; thanks. :)

pieberry; :) Thanks for the info on Ethiopia as well. I love learning these interesting little bits.

Heather and Sandra; while I do refer to myself as firstmother and use it often in my writing, I also respond fine to birthmother in others’ writing. If that makes ANY sense. ;) Sometimes I don’t. It’s kind of like how some people call me Jen and some people call me Jenna. But only my Dad can call me Jenny. ;)

Okay. I’m rambled out.

]]> By: JustJayne http://birthparents.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen/comment-page-1#comment-1264 JustJayne Fri, 22 Sep 2006 01:45:39 +0000 http://birth-first.www.adoptionblogs.com/2006/09/21/adoption-language-titles-and-my-preferen#comment-1264 <i>That is when it hit me: the title of Firstmother was working for me because I made the first decisions for her, as her Mother</i><br /> <br /> You got it exactly right, Jenna. You couldn't have said it more perfectly. That is when it hit me: the title of Firstmother was working for me because I made the first decisions for her, as her Mother

You got it exactly right, Jenna. You couldn’t have said it more perfectly.

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