I couldn't sleep on Saturday night. I was nervous for the following morning as I was singing a song in church. (It didn't go well. No, I don't want to talk about it.) As insomnia usually goes, I was flipping through the channels. Well, folks, Steel Magnolias was on and, let me tell you, it's an old favorite of mine. However, I hadn't watched in years and years. Not since my mid-college days when we would sit and sob over the movie. I hadn't watched it since becoming pregnant with the Munchkin, relinquishing her for adoption, getting married and having two children... more

The internet is a great way for friends and family to share pictures back and forth without the hassle of postage and money for gas on the way to the Post Office. The immediate gratification of uploading and posting a picture has people, world wide, sharing things that would otherwise take a lot of time or simply not be possible. Of course, there are those who want to abuse the fact that people are willing to upload and post pictures. This presents a unique dilemma for birth parents.

Perhaps you are a birth parent involved in an open adoption. Perhaps you... more

I wrote, just yesterday, about the importance of patience and how we act while waiting. I found another quote that I think really hits some adoption topics head-on regarding the type of patience we need to possess.

“Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow - that is patience.”

I nodded my head. I've been there, done that and have the t-shirt to prove it. Okay, well, maybe I don't have the t-shirt. Do they make one? Should I create one? Would it sell well?... more

I'm not a patient person. I suppose that's why I keep getting "blessed" with the patience lesson. Over and over and over. And over again. I wasn't patient as a child. (I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it!) I wasn't patient as a teen. (I wanted to grow up... now!) I wasn't patient in college. (Four years was an awfully long length of time!) And, as a parent, I'm not always patient. (You can't put both legs in the same hole!)

But I work at it. I do. Ask my Husband. I've been working on my patience level with my very headstrong, independent two year old... more

A birth mother friend of mine recently forwarded me an e-mail that she had received. In this e-mail, an adoptive mother, pregnancy counselor and adoption agency owner cussed at my friend, called her names and basically pulled out every ignorant trick in the book to get under my friend's skin. Thankfully my friend is an amazingly strong woman and the two of us had a good laugh at the other woman's expense. Sadly, this is not the first time I've seen people randomly reach out and attack birth parents on the internet.

I recently pulled down my personal adoption... more

A question was posed on the forums yesterday.

If you weren't connected by adoption, would you be friends with your child's other mother?

It was posted in a forum that fosters communication between adoptive and birth parents, hence the use of the word "other" as opposed to a specific triad side. The responses were varied, of course, and posed many great points.

Some... more

A fellow adoption news follower sent me a link to this "article." Of course, it's not an article. Instead it's a "Letter to the Editor" from a waiting adoptive mother to the newspaper in the city which the Pregnancy Pact teens all live. And by "Letter to the Editor," I mean "Letter to the Teens Themselves." Why this newspaper decided to print such an obvious and blatant "Give Me Your Baby" note is beyond me. It's... more

A recent discussion on the forums has adoptive parents talking about how they would feel if the birth parents moved to their city. As a birth parent who doesn't plan on moving until my Husband retires, I wondered the flip side of the question.

How would you (or I) feel, as a birth parent, if the adoptive family moved to your (or my) city?

Depending on the size of your city (mine is small!) and your similar likes (many) and dislikes, running into your child's adoptive family without warning could be a possibility in this... more

I always think I'm doing a great job at this parenting after placement thing. Until my children grow and develop and smack me with new things. Just the other day, my older son and I were sitting at the table eating our breakfast. And he asked, "Why doesn't Munchkin live with us?"

Color me floored. He's always been a verbal child. Sort of slow on the physical scale (but within range; just meaning he was never a climber and so on) but always pretty darn verbal. He's recently been asking some "big" questions about various life things. Some are funny. Some... more

The process of Terminating Parental Rights (TPR) was not explained to me prior to the birth of the child I relinquished for adoption. Actually, it wasn't explained in detail after her birth either. I found out much later that, had I been informed of the laws in our state, things would have been much easier for all involved. And so, I cannot scream it loud enough: learn the laws of your state regarding Termination of Parental Rights.

I will share my own misunderstanding(s).

When I placed in the state of Pennsylvania (and it seems that, since then,... more