Alaska is our first alphabetical state that gives some provisions for post-placement contact agreements, frequently referred to as contracts. For those unfamiliar with the terms, a post-placement contact agreement/contract is put together by birth and adoptive families (sometimes helped along by an agency or attorney) and sets out the terms for how they will interact after the Termination of Parental Rights is signed and the adoption has been finalized. They can include very specific language (dictating the dates that pictures will be sent or that visits will be had)... more

Remember how I was excited two weeks ago about an upcoming visit? And remember last week how I talked about supporting each other through hard times? Well, welcome to hard times. J & D have had to cancel the visit due to some unforeseen medical problems on their front. (That said, it was always possible that the visit could be canceled at the last minute if Parker decided to come... more

Welcome to November! While some crazy folk are attempting to write an entire (50,000 word) novel this month, there are other crazy folk who are going to attempt writing (at least) one blog post, per day, all month. That's right! It's time for NaBloPoMo! National Blog Posting Month for those not on the up and up with crazy abbreviations. That includes weekends. And holidays. (Thanksgiving much?!) And birthdays. (Nick turns two!) And, you know, the possible birth... more

I've been blogging here for an entire year. As of the beginning of this month, that is! I had looked back at some of my previous posts from this time last year and I can see the strides I've made in my own healing just by how I talk about various subjects. By no means am I suggesting that my adoption related grief and loss are issues of my past. No, not at all. I'm just pleased that I've managed to pull a few things together, make some sense of others and continued to learn about the issues that affect us all. It's been a good year. Not always easy but good!

That... more

I'm a domestic birth mother. My daughter was born in the United States and placed in the United States. On top of that, our adoption is fully open. I know where she lives and how to contact her family at a moments notice. I am luckier than mothers of domestic closed adoption, many of whom can only rely on hope of reunion. Beyond them, I am immensely more lucky than my sisters in adoption who happen to live in other countries and have children who were adopted into the United States.

This... more

If you hurry, get this all ready and in the mail by this afternoon or tomorrow, chances are that it could arrive in time for Halloween. (Halloween is next Wednesday, folks. How it's the end of October already, well, I haven't a clue.) But you need to read this, quickly, and then get your rear in gear! Let's go!

Kids like candy, right? I know I did as a child. (Though, not as much now. I wonder why that changed?) If your child's family celebrates Halloween and they are allowed to eat candy, take advantage of this super-easy gift giving tradition. You can go... more

I'm a pretty boring person. Being on bed rest only further assures that I will be at home, on the couch, at nine o'clock on this Saturday evening. However, a recent blurb article has just determined what I will be watching on my television (hopefully with a child fast asleep in his bed). "Facing Reality: Choices" will premiere on the Fox News Channel at 9 o'clock tomorrow evening. (Saturday, October 26)

What's it... more

Last week Coley covered an article on a new infant care center in Orange County, California. (Writing that makes me wonder how they're fairing with the fires that are ravaging Southern California.) While I had initially been intrigued by the article itself, I did a little more research. Because I'm nosy like that.

The program in question is Casa Teresa. They do provide some pretty nice services to single, poor and/or young mothers who are choosing... more

This might be surprising to some but adoption is not always rainbows and butterflies. (Did you hear, or, rather, see my sarcasm?) Sometimes it's made up of really hard work. Sometimes it's not so much hard work as it is hard "stuff." Emotions, situations and issues can pile up outside of the adoption-connected relationships and make it hard for people to work on other things.

And ya know, that's okay.

Speaking generally, D has been having some tough times as of late. I know that if our relationship wasn't what it is, she would have either neglected to... more

I'm rarely rendered speechless. (Just in case you missed that after a year of reading my blogs on this site.) However, as I was reading blogs yesterday via my Google RSS reader, I had to sit and stare at the screen for awhile. I then had to message a trusted friend, a non-birth mother, to see if I was totally off base in my confusion and offense. Once she had a similar reaction, it still took me a majority of the day to figure out why the wording on a shirt bothered the living snot out of me.

What did the shirt say?

Adoption is the new Pregnancy.

Now,... more