November 13th, 2011

heartAfter I placed Phoenix into the loving arms of my nurse, and the social workers left, leaving me alone. There was a moment when hope took a nose dive and I was fully aware of everything around me, and the pain was like something that seemed impossible for one person to have. November is National Adoption Month, fitting with the American tradition of family that is thanksgiving. I am thankful for the people who were there after, who watched me fall apart and pull myself together. I am thankful for my family, the Warners, who if I hadn't been able to go to their house that first night post hospital, I don't know if I could have handled it. Being thankful, for so much… [more]

A Note to Birth Parents During National Adoption Month

November 1st, 2008

I've written about my feelings regarding the Presidential Proclamation for National Adoption month in the past. This year, of course, hasn't seen any great changes in how Bush is addressing the month. Once again, birth parents are not mentioned. A commenter tried to argue that birth parents are included under the umbrella of "adoptive families" but, as birth parents, you and I know that is not the case. But I'm going to urge you to look past the blatant oversight this year. I hope that you and I both know the importance of our presence in our child's life with regard to open adoptions. Birth parents in reunion are learning and growing with their adult child and can hopefully see their importance as well. This month… [more]

Just a Bit of Empathy Again

May 21st, 2008

Many people touched by adoption know that May is National Foster Care month. While reforms are needed in foster care as well, I find this an easier month for me to acknowledge than November (which is National Adoption Awareness Month). However, I got to thinking about things the other night and I was struck by my lack of empathy and understanding. While many foster parents and parents who have adopted from the foster care system might be quick to point out that their child's biological parents have no capacity for caring, I'm sure that this is a hard month for some parents who have lost their children to foster care, however permanent or temporary. I'm often chastised, on this blog and elsewhere, for having a… [more]

Today Isn’t National Adoption Day

November 17th, 2007

Okay. It really is National Adoption Day. But it's also my (older) parented son's birthday. Today he turns two. And while I recognize the importance of children from foster care being granted permanent families, I'm kind of grumpy that the two days are falling upon one another. So, after this post, I will emotionally boycott any thought of adoption for the rest of the day. You see, adoption isn't this big celebratory thing for me. Or for my family. I lost a daughter. My Mom and Dad lost a granddaughter. My brother lost a niece. My sons, one of whom is on a sugar high already today, lost a sister. And today, even though my heart rejoices that children are getting the chance to live… [more]

National Adoption Month Makes Me Pout Every Year

November 1st, 2006

Pouting Today... but Just TodayI'm not going to talk politics. I'm simply going to talk about how I am left out of National Adoption Month and the Presidential Proclamation every single year. I understand, at the core, that this month isn't about me. It's about the children who are waiting to be adopted, who need to be adopted. It's about recognizing the need for adoptive parents. It's about celebrating families. But with that last sentence, I am always left out even though I am part of the Munchkin's family. Let's look at Bush's Proclamation this year and at one key paragraph that, once again, left me crying into my hot tea, just like every other year: As we observe National Adoption Month, we recognize the many caring… [more]