Sometimes I have issues that I don't even realize I have! While reading the forums, I came across a thread in which an adoptive mother was asking for advice. She had received a thank you note from her child's birth mother's parented daughter, thanking her for a recent gift. The (birth) mother had written the letter for her daughter who was not yet old enough to write. She had signed it with the following closing:

Hope... more

Children say the darndest things, don't they? Nick is only twenty months and he makes up some pretty funny things. The Munchkin, of course, is no exception. She's been known to leave adults crying tears of joy and laughter as she discusses the complexities of life through her own eyes. Of course, she also knows that she is funny so she keeps it up, laughing along with whomever she has tickled.

One of these funny things just so happened to be about adoption, pregnancy and age appropriate discussions on the... more

We're leaving early on Sunday morning for a week at the beach! I couldn't be more excited if I tried. Okay, I lied. I would be more excited if my daughter and her family were vacationing with us but, alas, that's not what is happening this time. While I've previously suggested taking a vacation together, we're heading to North Carolina with my own Mom and Dad, brother and his girlfriend, and, really, that's a lot of people in one house!

I have no doubt I'll... more

In reference to yesterday's post, I promised to bring you some snip-its of how others were affected by the subject and the wording of the quote itself. I made a post on my personal adoption blog that included the quote and prompted readers, no matter their triad title, to tell me how it made them feel and if they had been faced with a conversation of similar substance. People got talking. And I got to listening.

It didn't surprise me that birth... more

I wish she'd been smart enough, or loving enough, to realize everybody has burdens that crush them, only they don't give up their children.

While reading The Secret Life of Bees, this sentence made me put down the book, get a drink of water and retreat to the backyard which is my quiet place for thinking and self-reflection. It hit me, hard, the words of a daughter who had been left behind by her mother. I have always said and believe it to the core of my being that we, as birth and adoptive... more

To end the series on personal stories of adoption and marriage, I decided I should hit on my own experience. I answered my own interview questions, the same that were sent to our other participants. My story is my own but at the same time, echoes of what others have already said and experienced are found throughout my own words. Circumstance and situation may differ but certain things seem to float across that board.

As you know, I'm a birth mother involved in a fully open adoption. At the time of my wedding, the Munchkin was too... more

As I continue to share stories about weddings, marriage and adoption from other birth parents, an important issue to hit on is when birth parents of the (same) placed child marry. It is a long-standing myth within the adoption world and society at large that birth parents had no caring feelings for one another, were only a one night stand or that the majority of birth parents can't remember their partner's name. Tara and her Husband, Chad, involved in a fully open adoption with their son, disprove... more

In an interesting discussion on the forums, spawned from real life events, we have been mulling over the reasons why people on the internet join forums and various support groups claiming to be a birth mother when, in fact, they have never signed the Termination of Parental Rights. Different from scammers who wish to get money out of potential adoptive families, the purpose of these fakers isn't really known or understood.

When the conversation... more

I interviewed Breanna, a birth mother involved in a fully open adoption, regarding how adoption is having an effect on her wedding plans. Newly engaged with the wedding still some time away, she is smart enough to recognize some key issues regarding adoption and marriage and is addressing them ahead of time. For any birth parent in an open adoption planning a wedding or thinking of marriage sometime in the future, this interview is a must-read. Again, as situations vary from family to family, Breanna's experience may not... more

Last month I did a loose series (which means it accidentally became a series of related posts) on topics that surround weddings and marriage as they pertain to first parents. I promised to include personal stories from birth parents who have things to say on the matter. I'm just now getting around to finally collecting this information and sharing it with my readers.

Starting on Monday of next week, I will be sharing various stories on the matter. As always, the mothers that I surveyed include an array of both... more