I happened upon an interesting discussion on the forums. A family waiting to adopt was told by their attorney that Medicaid was "catching on to adoptive families" and advising hospitals to "hold the baby hostage" until the adoptive family agrees to pay or "pays in full in some cases."

I must first off commend those that spoke up and told this family to "run, not walk away, from this attorney." Shady, shady. However, I'm not all that surprised at the... more

The process of Terminating Parental Rights (TPR) was not explained to me prior to the birth of the child I relinquished for adoption. Actually, it wasn't explained in detail after her birth either. I found out much later that, had I been informed of the laws in our state, things would have been much easier for all involved. And so, I cannot scream it loud enough: learn the laws of your state regarding Termination of Parental Rights.

I will share my own misunderstanding(s).

When I placed in the state of Pennsylvania (and it seems that, since then,... more

I've been talking over the past two days about wills and things birth parents might want to consider with regard to their relinquished child(ren). I gave my personal reasons for including my placed daughter in my will and as a beneficiary on my life insurance. To wrap this discussion up, I thought I might give some ideas of things that could be passed on to your placed... more

Yesterday I gave some advice to all birth parents regarding relinquished children and inheritance laws. Basically, if you missed the post (go read!), whether or not you want your relinquished child to have access to an inheritance, you need to specifically state your desires in your will. I am now going to share my personal reasoning for including my placed daughter in both my will and as a beneficiary in my life insurance policy.

Disclaimer: These are personal... more

Not too many people like to spend an awful lot of time about thinking about what happens to their possessions should they pass, parents of all types should put some time and effort into making sure their wills are always up-to-date. Right now, of course, I'm going to talk about birth parents. Even more specifically, I'm talking to birth parents who want to make sure that their relinquished children inherit something upon their death.

The laws vary from state to state and that is why it is important for each first parent to know the laws that govern their... more

Truth be told, fathers in adoption often get the short end of the stick. Stereotypes held toward fathers are sometimes even worse and often harder to break. Society still sees birth fathers as men who have deserted a woman they got pregnant. Truth be told, some of these men have been lied to and deceived and, in the end, their loss is a child to parent.

While some laws have been instated to help protect a birth mother's rights (though how often these rights are stepped on is somewhat disturbing), biological... more

Adoption has a lot of problems which is why reformists are constantly pushing for change. We hear, too often, of Mothers who were coerced into placement by unethical agencies. We hear, too often, that there rights were neither defined or protected. However, the stories in which Fathers' rights were trampled upon are not heard as often but they're equally common and equally saddening.

I just learned of such a Father, stuck in a nightmare within the Utah legal system. You see, he Fathered a child... more

An interesting, yet somewhat sad story from Law.com revolving around an adoptee's search for her biological mother, the Jell-O fortune and laws that, basically, suck. However, triumphant in the end, the daughter, Elizabeth McNabb, was just awarded money after taking the case to court.

Reading the article, we find that after the mother died, her will stated that her money be left to her living child[ren]. Elizabeth met... more

Some of you may have read elsewhere that the United States is getting ready to implement the Hague adoption treaty. As a birth mother who placed in a domestic adoption, perhaps you feel that doesn't effect you or matter in your life. Wrong.

As part of the treaty, all agencies must be accredited. The Council on Accreditation (COA) is in charge of this process. Again, what's that mean to you? The COA has opened up a comment period to the public through January 31, 2007. If you've had an unethical or unlawful experience with an adoption agency, this is your chance to speak up. The list is here.... more

Last week during "delurking week," I asked a few questions to get to know some readers, and see if there were any special requests. One request was for more about birth dads, so I have decided to do a series about birth dads. We do not talk about birth dads as much as we probably should. They remain largely invisible in discussions about adoption.

I intend to discuss birth dads in general, then talk specifically about some birth dads that I know. The role that birth dads can play in their children's lives in open adoptions will be a topic... more