We frequently hear from adoptive families that are struggling to get their child's birth family to remain in consistent contact. We feel their aggravation. We want better for the child in question. We want easier relationships for all involved. We raise our voices in hopes that these birth parents are listening. And yet, what about the other side of the coin?

A birth mother who has been struggling to keep the communication afloat in her own open adoption asked... more

The fear factor in adoption permiates all members of the triad. Allowing our fears to control our decisions is a recipe for disaster. Although fear is a normal emotion and we cannot expect to never experience it, we can find safe ways to face our fears and not be controlled by them.

All sounds quite easy, but of course tackling our fears is anything but easy. Facing our fears takes courage and strength. However, making decisions clouded by our fears does not always allow us to make wise decisions. This can be true for any triad member.

I firmly believe... more

Telling others that you placed a child for adoption is often no easy task. Depending on what part of the country and the community that you live in are only a few factors that probably affect your decision. (I live in Southern California, lucky me!) The type of family you have is generally a factor as well. Your cultural or ethnic background are factors as well.

Obviously, if your adoption is open, keeping your child a secret is more problematic. However, you may still be leery of telling people that you placed a child for adoption. There are many reasons... more

You know it. You know it to your core. You're doing something. Your mind is engaged in whatever it is that you're doing. Perhaps you're in another room, washing dishes. Or you're in a public place, leafing through a book that you may or may not purchase. And suddenly, it strikes you. You don't know where your child is or what he is doing. Worse, you can't see or hear him.

It happens to me now and again. I was just washing the dishes in our kitchen, which opens into our living room where Nicholas has been having a field day on an air matress.... more